Dog Gone Blog - The Dog Blog for Real Dogs

Separation anxiety

Reader Marika writes:

"I have a 4 year old Golden Retriever, Dakota, who I love and adore and spoil way too much.  I've had her for a year now - she was relinqushed for adoption by her previous family because she refused to remain in their unfenced yard.  She briefly lived in a foster home before coming to me.  Until recently, she has been practically perfect (if you overlook her inability to always come when called).  No major issues.  A month ago, I went on vacation for 10 days - the longest we had been apart.  During that time, she stayed with three different people - including one person dropping her off at her doggy day care and a separate person picking her up.  Since I have returned, she seems to have developed some separation anxiety issues.  When I drop her off at the day care (a once a week treat because she used to adore it) - she doesn't want to go (though they tell me she has fun while there). Once I hand one of the people her leash, she digs her feet into the floor and won't budge (instead of sprinting to get back to her friends like she used to).  today, the lady had to physically turn Dakota away from me.  I try to keep our good bye simple, but it doesn't seem to make a difference.  Another example - last summer when I ran track workouts, I would tie her to the fence and she would just lie down and wait for me.  I tried that last week - and she whined the entire time (the first time I have heard her do that) and started digging.

 I have a family vacation in Idaho planned... and I am worried to go now.  I live in Anchorage, a place with no real snakes and I am scared to take her because of the potential for rattlesnakes. However, I am also scared to leave her behind.  Am I just over-reacting?  Is there a way to cure her of her newfound separation anxiety?"

Marika's question about how to cure her dog's separation anxiety is one I get a lot.  Separation anxiety is something you don't want to mess around with because the possibility of a small case getting much worse is high and I'm thrilled that Marika wants to nip this problem in the bud before it gets much worse.

Marika's dog is adopted and separation anxiety is fairly common in dogs who have been relinquished by their first owners.  This dog not only had a first home but also a second for a short period of time with a foster family before ending up in her forever home with Marika.  She's an adult dog who, by Marika's own admission, has been loved and "spoiled" by her new owner since her adoption.   I hate to say this, but that sent some red flags up.   I can't speak for Marika, but "spoiled" dogs are quite often not given the proper cues before major life changes are going to happen.  We overcompensate for our lifestyle changes by showering our dogs with love and affection, teaching the dogs to get used to this attention, and then abruptly stop it when we're not around so much.  Talk about pulling the rug out from under the dog!

I'm sure Dakota was pretty happy with her new routine in her new home until Marika went on vacation and had to have Dakota shuttled between multiple pet watchers.  This is not to say that Marika shouldn't have gone on vacation, she's an adult and she should have her own life, and I don't even know from the limited information I have if the transition between owner to sitter and back could have been any smoother, but now that she's home I don't think Dakota wants to see her owner go away anytime soon.  But she is, Marika's going on another vacation (actually, she's probably already gone on that vacation.  Her question didn't come up in the queue until now - sorry Marika!), and the dog isn't going to like it.

The best thing to do with a dog with separation anxiety is to start them on an intense desensitizing program.  Start by getting the dog used to you leaving for short periods of time and then work up to leaving the dog for extended periods of time, like a vacation.  For guidelines on how to do this, check out this article on the ASPCA website and then call a trainer if you need help.

The same goes for the daycare, if your dog doesn't want to leave you for what normally is his favorite activity try getting him used to just the drive over to the daycare facility.  Praise him for being there and then drive home.  Work in small steps - drive to facility; drive to facility and get out of the car with the dog; drive to the facility, get out of the car with the dog, walk to the front door, etc. - until you can walk into the daycare, hand over your dog and leave without too much stress to the dog.

Remember, there is no magic bullet.  Your dog's separation anxiety could be a big problem and that means big solutions.  It's going to take some time and effort on your part to ease your dog back into a normal routine.  In the meantime, my advice to Marika is to enlist the help of a dog trainer and/or a certified pet behaviorist in her area for Dakota's separation anxiety.  A trainer will help with those step by step solutions.

In the meantime, try the book "I'll Be Home Soon" by Patricia McConnell.  Short and easy to read, that's a good place to start.

Good luck!

Oh, my barking dog

One of the most common questions I get asked, on this blog and in my classes, is "How do I get my dog to stop barking?".  And I cringe, inwardly of course (no one needs to know how much I hate this question... except now you do.  Oh well.), because most people won't like to hear what I have to tell them.  Barking is a difficult behavior to stop  - not difficult in that's it's hard to do, just time consuming and requires the owner to be very keyed into their dog's behavior - and most of the dog owners who ask me are so far at the end of their rope that they're looking for the quickest fix possible.  Sorry, training a dog not to bark takes time and a lot of patience and a change in lifestyle to a certain degree.  No easy fix here.

What I fear when I tell owners how much consistent training it's going to take to fix this behavior is that they'll immediately run out and buy shock collars for their dogs.  I have a very hard time with the idea of shocking a dog to train it when there are other, more humane ways of teaching a dog correct behaviors.

There is a company out there (that will not be named here) who claims they can train your dog not to bark by the use of vocal cues and body postures - and I will admit in full disclosure that I know next to nothing about these companies, having never met with them myself - but they offer a guarantee and I'm always wary of any trainer that offers a guarantee.  I have a better solution, in my opinion, below. 

But first...

Most of the time, a dog who barks does so out of frustration.  The dog sees something he wants but can't get to it, so he starts to bark, for instance.  If you'd like your dog to stop barking a good place to start is by restricting access to that which frustrates him.  Is he barking while outside?  Bring him inside.   

I know, too simple, right?  Well, maybe.  There is more involved but that's one place to begin.  As much as I'd love to outline for you all the ways you can help your dog to stop barking, every dog is different.  What your dog is barking at may not be the reason why your neighbor's dog is barking.  So, instead, I'm going to point you to a few resources that can help you.

- First, has your dog received any training?  You can find a very good trainer through the APDT (Association of Pet Dog Trainers) website.  Your dog needs the fundamentals before you can start getting to the tougher issues.  Work with a trainer, either in classes or in your home - they both have pros and cons based on the needs of the individual dog, but they're both good options.  In my opinion, every dog can benefit from training and most dogs who have already received some basic training can benefit from more.

- This booklet aptly titled "Barking" by my idol, Dr. Ian Dunbar, will change your life (actually, it's part of a larger series that I think, if you want to have a better relationship with your dog, you should invest in NOW).  The booklet is short (barely 26 pages) and easy to read with simple, humane instructions on how to help your dog stop barking.  I think I will make it my life's mission to preach the gospel of Dunbar.

- The HSUS has a good bit of information on why your dog barks and what you can do about it.  It's worth checking out.

Dogs bark, my friends, it's part of that inherent dogness I keep talking about, but that doesn't mean we have to live with it.  I have no problem telling you that I, too, have barky dogs.  As a matter of fact, I stopped in the middle of writing this to go outside with my two pooches, with bait bag and clicker in hand, because I have contractors working on my home today.  Contractors, as well as the UPS guy, are the bane of my dogs' existence.  So while I had the perfect opportunity practically handed to me, the people that start my dogs barking in my backyard but separated by a fence (another frustration - barriers), I worked with my dogs to get them to look toward the contractors and back to me without barking.  It didn't take very long with my clicker and bag full of liver treats to convince my dogs that listening to me was far more advantageous than barking at the strange men.

And let me tell you, a whole bunch of liver treats are a lot less expensive, and a lot more humane, than shocking your dog into submission.

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If you have a dog training question, please email them to Dog Gone Blog [at] Yahoo [dot] com.

A wood chewing dog

Angela writes:

"We got ourselves a rescue dog, WAIT I am so rude! First, thanks for your dogblog!

Okay, a little backstory, rescue dog brought home at 9 months (him) and there was no abuse in his past, he just needed the right home and his mom and her boyfriend couldn't keep him around. Sad. But happy for us...

Fred has been awesome! I have been working with him on simple commands and he picks it up right away. He doesn't jump or bark a lot, and is so sweet and good. All he wants is to be right there with you. Which brings us to my question: I know he has separation anxiety, but why does he need to eat wood? He has eaten thru a large chunk of a tree stump in our yard, and is working on the bark of the small cypress in the side yard. I give him chew toys, and bones, but he prefers wood. This scares me a bit. He loves to be outside laying in the sun with a nice chunk of bark. Is this okay? How can I help him?

Thank you so much, again, am enjoying the blog."

Fred, the incredible wood eating dog, is not unusual in his preference for chew toys.  A lot of dogs like to chew wood for one reason or another, but it is not a behavior you want to encourage.  Splinters from the wood can lodge in the dogs mouth, across the throat, and between the teeth.  Or pieces of the wood can penetrate the esophagus or stomach causing internal bleeding.  I'm not a veterinarian so you're not going to get the correct medical jargon from me, but I did find this article written by a vet on the subject of all that can go wrong if your dog is a stick chewer.  You really need to read it if your dog has a preference for sticks and twigs.  Just a warning, the website can be a bit scary.  You wont want your dog to even glance at a tree again.

I can, however, help you stop the behavior.  Ready?

Restrict your dog's - or in this case, Fred's - access to wood.  Done.  No more stick chewing.

You all hate me right now, don't you?  On the heels of my last post here I am again that training a dog can be as easy as removing the temptations before they become habits.  Angela said, "He loves to be outside laying in the sun with a nice chunk of bark."  Well, that's kind of like saying, "But my toddler loves to play with his father's power tools."  It's up to you, the owner, to decide what is the correct behavior for your dog to develop.  If this is not exactly what your dog wants, tough tootsies for him.  If his sticks, or tree trunk, are kept from him he'll eventually move on to other things to chew.

Now, I know that it's not always as easy as removing a temptation.  Angela did mention that there was a tree trunk that Fred liked to gnaw on.  I think until Fred can be trusted not to eat wood anymore the trunk needs to be covered or surrounded with something. 

• The trunk can be surrounded by chicken wire (easy enough to cut to size) or covered in metal netting or stainless steel wire mesh (find at your local plant nursery or hardware store), for instance. 

• You could also try covering the stump in rough burlap and then stapling it to the bottom, leaving no piece of the wood showing, but this only works if your dog wouldn't chew the burlap either. 

• There are chew stops in liquid form that can be sprayed on the stump, like Bitter Apple, but to cover that much area you'd be spraying constantly.
   
• A trick that I picked up from the horse people I know is to cover any edible wood surface (or anywhere a dog might chew, for that matter) with Irish Spring soap.  Just rub the dry bar on the tasty surface and, viola, not so tasty anymore.

You've removed the enticing wood, now what?  Toys!  Lots of fun chew toys the dog only gets when he goes outside.  Toys that you will take away from the dog when he is no longer out on his own in the yard, because the toys should be special and exciting.

I've mentioned Kong's in the past.  I love those things, can't say enough about them.  But there's a lot of chewy toys on the market, you just need to find the one or two that your dog really likes.  Kong's, Bumpers, and Tire Biters are good, safe toys to leave with your dog.  If Fred's really bored then get him a treat ball, like a Buster Cube, and let him push that around the yard for awhile until he gets all the yummy treats out of it.  And, of course, limit his access to the outdoors if he cannot be supervised.

I hope that Fred loses his taste for wood.  It's going to take some time but taking away something he likes is so much better than a visit to the emergency room.

Lead me not into temptation - (un)secrets of a dog trainer

I'm back from Blogher and I do apologize for not posting sooner, but my family recently suffered a huge loss and that's taking up all my mental energy.  But I want to keep this blog going and the best way to do that is to just write something.

So, here I am.  Writing.

I know I owe some answers to the questions you have already sent me, and I'll get to them very soon (and please keep them coming!), but until then I'll let you into one of the biggest secrets of dog trainers.

Are you ready?

There are no secrets.  No, really.  We dog trainers tell you guys everything we know.  Dog training is not rocket science but you do have to open your eyes and take in the bigger picture.  And you have to see things through your dog's eyes.

(Go ahead, get down on all fours and have a look around.  I'll wait.)

For instance, one of the most asked questions in my class is "How do I get my dog to stop grabbing things off the counter?".  And my answer: "Stop leaving things on the counter."  I'm not trying to be a wise guy, I'm being completely serious.  The first time that your dog smells something yummy on your kitchen counter and then swipes it when you're not looking, he's hooked.  That counter is now a source of good things.  Instant gratification.  The same goes for dogs who chew shoes.  Stop leaving your shoes out.  Easy peasy, lemon squeezy.

I've said it before and I'll say it a million more times before I'm done: people are oftentimes the source of their dogs worst behaviors.  Chewing, digging, jumping, barking, food snatching - these are all things that dogs do inherently.  We, as their owners, want them to stop doing that but sometimes we're not willing to change even a little bit to accommodate the darn dog.  Not that I want you to change your life completely for your dog.  Oh no.  But I do want you to put aside a little of your old life for them.  And I, and all the other professionals dealing with canines I know, want you to teach your dog the proper way to behave in your home.  Sometimes that means surveying the landscape and looking for the pitfalls before they happen.

(Are you still down on all fours?  Good.  Stay.  Good reader.  Have a cookie.) 

Another thing I say, ad nauseum, in my classes is:  It's easier to teach a correct behavior than it is to undo an incorrect one.  Going back to the counter surfing scenario, once your dog has snatched a nice juice steak off the counter he's hooked.  However, if he never knew that nice juicy steaks were on the counter for the snatching he might never have picked up on that behavior.

And then there's the Leave It command, but that's the subject for another post.

So, there you have it.  One of my un-secrets of dog training.  Stop the behavior before it starts.   That'll be fifty bucks.

Just kidding.  You can thank me later.

3 year old twins afraid of the family pup

Here's a question from reader Dawn:

"I recently acquired a golden retriever puppy.  She is wonderful and in nearly one week is potty trained and sits.  The problem is my twin girls that are almost four.  They are terrified of her.  One of them is getting better but not the other one.  I am in need of advice.  I just never expected this.  I am a huge dog lover and would like to make this work out.  Any suggestions?"

Okay, this is me trying not to preach, but preach I must just a little bit.  Not necessarily because of what Dawn wrote about her situation but more because I don't know the entire history so I'm going to cover all the bases. 

I cannot stress enough, first and foremost, that if you're going to get a dog, especially a puppy, you must make sure your kids are as ready for a dog as you are.  At the age that Dawn's daughters are their attitudes - about anything from puppies to popsicle flavors - can change in a millisecond.  Putting myself in Dawn's shoes (because, again, I don't know the whole story) perhaps they were fine with a friend's or relatives' dogs, maybe even puppies that they had encountered away from their home.  The twins might have seemed ready for their own dog on the surface, but a puppy in your own home is a whole new ballgame.  And that ballgame comes with crazy energy and really bad manners.

Puppies can come on a bit strong under the best of circumstances, but to a little kid a jumpy puppy can be really intimidating.  To a pre-schooler they can be downright terrifying.  This - introducing children to dogs - is a delicate situation that needs to be handled with care.  As a parent, the last thing you want is a child (or two) who grow up with a fear of dogs and as a dog owner you don't want to have to give up the dog.  So follow your child's lead, if they don't want direct contact with the dog don't force them.  Rome was not built in a day and your son or daughter will not learn to love dogs overnight.

I'm thrilled to hear that Dawn is currently working with her dog on basic commands and progress is good.  The better trained the dog is the easier it will be to get the girls to accept her.  Until then all contact between puppy and kids should be closely supervised by an adult who will be able to step in to correct not just the puppy's behavior but also the girls' behavior.  When kids are intimidated by a dog they will either run away - oftentimes screaming - or lash out.  All interested parties should be protected from each other and that means that pup should be crated unless an adult is there.

(These recommendations are mainly for a puppy or younger dog that is already in the home and, therefore, the family has more time to work on this.  Getting a child used to a friend's or a family member's dog is a little bit different.)

I find that it's easier to introduce a puppy to a child when the pup is on leash; with the responsible adult controlling the dog's jumping or lunging.  So puppy should be on leash whenever she is out of her crate.  The children should be encouraged to pat the dog under the chin or on the back (never on top of the head.  never ever ever on top of the head.) but only when they are ready.  Don't force it.  Just let the dog and the kids sit close together (kids on couch, dog on floor to start) without touching for awhile until they are all comfortable and calm.

 

When the dog is sleeping in her crate, try reading books about dogs to your kids.  Talk about your puppy with them, remind them of all the great things a puppy can do, and demonstrate with a stuffed dog the correct ways to interact with your pup.  It's easier to teach kids with a fake dog than it is to throw them in with an excitable puppy.

When your child is feeling more secure encourage them to join you in rolling a ball to the dog or help them place a cookie down in front of the dog.  At the age of three-almost-four Dawn's girls can also set down the dog's food dish (with mom keeping the dog under control on-leash) or give a simple command - like sit.   These will help your kids gain a sense of control and responsibility for the dog.

The key to all of this interaction is control (have I said that word enough yet?); the puppy, as well as the kids, should be under control as much as possible .  No mean feat, right?  If you have kids and/or dogs you know that keeping them all calm takes a lot of patience on your part.  And here's where you come in parents - if you're calm and secure your kids will feel more secure.  If you're pushing at the dog yelling "Off!  Stop jumping!  Stop it!" your kids are going to be a little freaked out.  Take a deep breath and remember that you kids learn by example and that your dog, if you train him or her, will not always be this crazy.

There's more to it, of course, but this is a blog so I'm keeping it all as brief as possible.  I've given you the basics, now I encourage any of you with kids who might be afraid of dogs to do more reading on this subject.  For more information on dogs and kids try the book "Dogs and Children" by Barbara Sykes and "Childproofing Your Dog" by Brian Kilcommons.

Thunder and Lightning and Fireworks, Oh My

This one's a doozy, and very timely.

Mayberry Mom writes:

"It's almost the 4th of July, and in our state fireworks are legal. That is very bad news for our pup. She is terrified of the sound (thunderstorms too). Rescue Remedy doesn't work. Should we get an rx from our vet or... anything else we can do for her?

She is a 9-ish year old shepherd mix."

Mayberry Mom isn't the only person to have asked this question.  I've received a number of emails with this same question - how to help a dog be less fearful of loud noises like thunder or fireworks.  Noise phobias are a fairly common but extremely tough topic to cover.  Every year dogs are injured or go missing after jumping through windows and screen doors trying to escape the horrible noise.  With the Fourth of July coming up soon and summer thunderstorms popping up constantly I wish I had an easy solution for you owners of dogs who have these fears.  But I don't.  Training a dog to be less fearful takes time and consistent training.

What owners like Mayberry need is an intensive desensitizing program for their dogs.  Time playing CDs of thunder and fireworks noises, enlisting the help of friends and family to make noises outside of the house (because the thunder and the fireworks?  They usually come from outside, not inside), and many, many treats.

(I'm being very simplistic when I say this.  It takes a bit more than what I just very quickly described.)

 

In the interest of full disclosure I will tell you that I have never had to desensitize any of my dogs to loud noises.  Most of my dogs came to me as puppies and as soon as I got them home I'd run the vacuum constantly, I'd play loud music, slam doors, and I never made a big deal out of thunder storms other than distributing the occasional treat.  I was also lucky that I got unflappable, "bomb-proof" dogs.   Some dogs are just more high-strung than others, mine just happen to be very laid back.  Lucky me, not so lucky you.  But I have worked with a number of dog owners with this same problem.  If you have a thunder or fireworks phobic dog you are not alone.

Fear is a very strong emotion, stronger than almost all others, and what a lot of owners don't realize is that they're actually teaching their dogs to be fearful in these situations.  Think about it, if your dog shows even the littlest amount of fear when a thunderstorm roles around what do you do?  Pet the dog and tell him it's okay?  Ooh, poor baby, you're scared?  Uh uh.  Babying your dog when they're fearful only acts as a reinforcement for that fear.  It flies in the face of everything we humans, especially parents, understand when it comes to helping the ones we love, but in this case you really need to think like a dog.

What you should do, for dogs who aren't too far gone, is treat a thunderstorm like it was a party or better yet like it was no big deal.  Thunderstorm?  What thunderstorm?  Dog is calm?  Throw him a cookie.   A thunderstorm!  That's pretty cool!  Cookies for everyone!  If your dog is getting coveted treats every time a loud noise happens there is a good chance he'll be looking forward to the next bang, pop or rumble.

However...

Not every dog can be desensitized.  Every dog is different and some just have a harder time than most, depending on their level of fear.  Here's a great article at Clicker Solutions that you should check out.  It will give you a taste of what you might be in for if your dog shows signs of noise phobia.

Here's another about that "babying" I mentioned earlier.  I'll warn you, it's all about classical and operant conditioning but it's well worth the read.  Bet you never even thought about how scientific dog training was, did you?

For the severely phobic dogs, talk to your veterinarian and explore some of the options out there for helping your dog.  Sometimes a prescription is necessary.  But beware of all the junk out there on the market for your scared dog because some of it is just that - junk.  I've never heard of a DAP Diffuser, for instance, working for a truly phobic dog.  Or Rescue Remedy for that matter.  Maybe they work for  a dog who just has a slight fear of noises, I don't really know.  I'm all for holistic approaches to caring for our dogs, and I'm not a scientist or a veterinarian, but if your dog is truly and severely phobic you might want to think about something like Xanax until you can spend some time properly training him.

Here's some more reading for you - An interesting, and timely article about thunderstorm phobias in dogs from USA Today. With some very good tips on how to keep your dog safe during a thunderstorm.

Until your dog is either desensitized (as much as possible) or medicated, find a nice quiet place in the house for him to hang out in with you nearby displaying just how uninterested you are in the thunderstorm or fireworks.  And stick to sparklers.  They're much less noisy.

Books I love on this topic:

Responsible dog owners make good neighbors (a good fence doesn't hurt either)

Reader Julie has an interesting question regarding her neighbor's dog:

"They [the neighbors] have some sort of little toy dog... who has repeatedly dug its way into our yard, and even broken into our house via the cat door.  It's aggressive. Runs loose outside all the time, is regularly found some distance away or in the street, and frequently rushes up to our car when we arrive in our drive, whereupon it then leaps, jumps (and inadvertently scratches) the kids.  It's simply an untrained animal, which I find dangerous. I feel sorry for it, but don't want it running loose in my yard, tearing up my yard, or in my house, tearing up my house and kids.

I've spoken to my neighbor, who claims the dog is beyond her. She's gotten it a kennel but claims it chewed its way out, tried locking it in the utility room but claims it chewed its way out of there too.  She tells me it's not mean, and just tell it to go home and not worry.

In short, the neighbors in the neighborhood end up handling this dog all the time.Several of us want to do something but are unsure what to do and how to approach it. One neighbor loves this dog... This neighbor is willing to adopt this dog from the owner and train it properly.

Any advice?  Should we train it ourselves? Approach her about training? Approach her about the adoption?"

Neighbor problems are not my favorite thing to tackle, on my blog or in my life offline, but tackle them we must.  Julie has a neighbor problem of the worst sort - a neighbor who won't, either by choice or incompetence, control her dog.  The dog suffers, the neighborhood residents suffer, and, most importantly to me, the neighborhood kids could be in danger.

My advice to people who have neighbors like Julie's is to have a long, respectful talk with the owner of the dog in question.  Tell them your concerns, again in a respectful manner, and see if a compromise can be reached.  However, in Julie's case it sounds like that has already been done. 

I have seen little dogs who can seemingly escape from almost every confinement.  But something has to be done about this dog.  Training, of course, is the advice I have but it doesn't sound like the owner is willing to do that.  Another action has to be taken.  Time for plan B.  Plan B is not pretty.

Just because the dog is small that doesn't mean it isn't dangerous or that the dog itself isn't in danger.  I'd hate to hear that the dog was hit by a car, or attacked by a larger animal, just because the owner wouldn't step up and be responsible.  I'm afraid that the proper authorities have to be contacted, like the local dog officer.  I don't know what the leash laws in Julie's town are, but even if the leash laws are a bit lax the dog is a nuisance and needs to be handled.  Its damaging property and threatening children.

If the dog officer picks up the dog the current owner can get the dog back, but they'll have to pay a fee and provide proper documentation - like proof of rabies vaccination and a current valid dog license.  If this happens enough times the owner might get the hint, or the dog will be up for legal adoption.

The other neighbor whom Julie spoke of, the one who wanted to take the dog, could also approach the dog's owner and possibly come to a deal.  The other neighbor is willing to take the dog and train it in return for full ownership.  It sounds ideal but probably won't happen easily.

When handling any case like this it's best to keep talks as respectful as possible - I know I've said that already but you do still have to live near this person - but in the end you are responsible for protecting your family.  If the dog in question is dangerous you have the legal right to do something about it.

What would you do in this situation?  And, please, don't say "kick the dog".  It's okay to think it but, jeez, that's just wrong.

Is your child old enough for a puppy?

I was driving through a neighboring town the other day, taking my time through the quaint but bustling center, when my eye caught this sight:  A young mother - she was 26, tops, but I think she was more like 23 - pushing a stroller with a baby less than a year old seated in it.  She was using both hands to push the stroller but one hand also held a flexi-lead (don't even get me started on those contraptions), which was attached to a rambunctious Boxer puppy.   The pup was doing everything in his power to wrap that woman and her stroller in the unforgiving metal line of the flexi, which caused the woman to trip repeatedly and the stroller to tilt dangerously toward the street.  She would stop, unwind herself and her stroller, reign in her puppy, check her baby, and then start again only to repeat this process three steps later.

I smiled and I cringed.  Why would this young mother subject herself to raising a puppy and an infant at the same time?  Why would she want to subject herself to that?

I've got an idea or two.

It's a very romantic notion to get a puppy when your child is still so young.  After all, some think, shouldn't a child grow up with a puppy?  Wouldn't it be great for the two of them to grow and mature together?

In a word, no.

I'm frequently asked by would-be pet owners "When is the best time to get a puppy?" and "Are my children old enough?".  Dog Trainer and author Brian Kilcommons and Sarah Wilson recommend In their book Childproofing Your Dog:

"The best time to get a dog is after your child is age four, maybe even five if you want to raise a puppy. Younger children do not have the mental understanding or physical ability to be consistently gentle. If you have younger children and a dog, read the relevant sections and SUPERVISE! People sometimes want to get a new puppy when the child is an infant on the theory that they'll grow up together. Save yourself the stress and exhaustion—one baby at a time please!"

Based on my experience with dog owners I agree wholeheartedly - and why wouldn't I agree with an expert(??) - Kilcommons and Wilson know what they're talking about.  At four a child has the capacity to follow instructions, such as "Please stop pulling on the puppy's tail" and "Don't poke the puppy in the eye with that stick".  And they can help out with simple tasks like grooming and feeding the puppy.  Getting your children involved in caring for a puppy at that age will set your whole family up for easier times in the future.

I think back to the days when my daughter was a colicky newborn, and then a very needy infant, and now a demanding toddler.  I cannot even fathom training a puppy during any of these phases of her life, never mind exercising and socializing a puppy the way he or she would deserve and require.   I think the combination of the two, an infant and a pup, would have driven me off the deep end for sure.  And my daughter is not the exception to the norm.  I've got news for parents-to-be, with exception for the colic she is the norm.  Very young children are very demanding and so are very young puppies.

Puppies, much like babies, require supervision.  Lots and lots of supervision.  They also require, as I mentioned above, training and socialization.  When your toddler is climbing the bookcase at the same time that your puppy is jumping on the counter to steal your family's dinner, which one would you attend to first?

So, mothers and fathers of infants and toddlers, take my advice and do yourself a favor:  wait until your children are a bit older before you get that puppy.  Your children and your would-be dog will benefit from your patience - as will you.  You can thank me later.

 

Your Dog is Not Our to Get You - Part 2 digging and chewing

Okay, I'm done slacking off.  I promised you a part 2 to the "Your Dog is Not Out to Get You" post from over a week ago.  This time we'll talk about destructive behaviors, like digging and chewing.

I could go on forever about all the reasons your dog might dig or chew but the bottom line is this:  They're dogs.  They dig.  They chew.  Sorry, but it's part of their inherent dogness.  But those behaviors don't fit in with our lifestyles so we need to learn how to correct them.  Or better yet, stop them before they begin.

Bobita writes: "The [dog] only digs, rips [stuff] apart and shreds trees and shrubs when no one is in sight.  She seems to have it particularly out for me.  When she sees me and knows that she has committed some atrocity, she looks at what she has done, looks at me, cowers and then slinks away (likely because I have given her looks from the fiery depths of purgatory for each and every egregious act, accompanied by a whole slew of foul, yet appropriate, obscenities).

Why is Bobita's dog destroying things?  The key words in that first sentence are "when no one is in sight".  She has a young Labrador Retriever pup, a dog who is bred to be social and needs to stay close to his master and/or mistress.  The dog may have been bored and probably a bit anxious that her mistress left her outside by herself so she took it out on the trees and shrubs.  And not because they were of any importance but, possibly, because the dog had just seen Bobita digging around there herself.  The trees and the area around it may have had Bobita's scent on it, or the dog may have figured if her mistress was digging around there then it was good enough for the dog.  It looked like fun! 

These dogs really want to be with us.  To take your attention away is agonizing for these them, and not just labs but most other breeds as well. 

Let's concentrate on digging for a moment.  If your dog is digging out of boredom - exercise the dog.  A tired dog is a happy dog, after all.  Or give them an appropriate place to dig, like their very own dig box.  Make an area that looks a bit like a child's sand box.  Fill it with dirt and then hide things, like toys and biscuits, for them to find.  That's their reward for digging there.  Stand nearby and praise them when they've made a great discovery.  Discourage them from digging in other places and move them back to the dig box.  If you're consistent this should stop a lot of the digging.  However, the best way to stop a dog from digging, besides just exercise, is to keep the dog where she can be supervised.  If you can't stop her while she's in the act you've lost the opportunity to correct the behavior (just like eliminating in the house).  Keep her in the house with you or in her own kennel or crate.

Destructive chewing follows the same pattern.  Dog is bored or anxious = dog chews and destroys.  Is there a rhyme or reason to it?  Maybe, maybe not.  If you have a destructive dog it's best not to leave them unsupervised with free reign of the house.  Consider a crate or a safe place in the house where they can be gated off from the rest of the rooms.  Give the dog a stuffed Kong or a treat ball (I love that product almost as much as I love the Kong and you can order it through this page - see below) to keep them occupied.  I will never understand why dog owners insist on letting their dogs roam the entire house when they're not there when the owner knows the dog is destructive.  If your dog has eaten the couch cushions it's time for another plan of action, don't you think?  And exercise, exercise, exercise!  Exercise is good for helping stop most problem behaviors.  I can't emphasize that enough.

It certainly isn't too late for Bobita and her puppy.  A steady routine of exercise, training, and supervision and that pup will turn out to be a fantastic dog.  And yours will too!

Your dog is not out to get you

I know, it's hard to believe but it's true.  Your dog is not plotting his revenge for when you leave the house.  He's not lying in wait, head on paws, taking an internal inventory of your favorite dress shoes all the while picking his favorite to chew to shreds if you dare as so much walk out the front door.

Dogs are not vindictive.  Bottom line.  End of story.

The casual dog owner has a hard time accepting this concept.  Humans are vengeful, so why aren't dogs?  First of all, they don't have the capacity to think like that.  Dogs are pretty simple animals and once we strip away all the human characteristics that we put upon these poor animals the better our relationships will be. 

But I can see, to the uninformed owner at the end of their rope, how most destructive behavior seems like a personal attack by the dog on them.  Rover pees on the dining room rug.  Owner admonishes dog for peeing and rug, making a big deal out of the incorrect behavior while cleaning up the offensive spot.  As soon as owner is out of eyesight dog pees in the same darn spot on the dining room rug.

Lather, rinse and repeat.

(If you'd like, swap expensive shoe chewing for peeing in the house or, in the case of my rescued dog Lana soon after we brought her home, remote control and cell phone eating.  Each case is fairly similar.)

(Yes, my dog once ate my cell phone.  That's another for another time.)

Let's talk about eliminating in the house.

 

In the peeing on the floor case let's assume that the dog is housebroken and has no medical problems that would force him or her to lose control of their bowels spontaneously.  They've just peed in the house once or twice, for whatever reason (fear, full bladder + slow owner, etc.) and now they continue to do so when the owner is not around.  Also, this is not to be confused with "marking".

Once a dog pees somewhere they can tell by scent exactly where that spot is long after you've cleaned it.  You need a cleaner specifically made for cleaning dog and cat odors (I recommend this product ) to get rid of most of it and even then a dog's sense of smell is so powerful that it tends to linger in their consciousness.  Especially if it gets into your carpet pad.   

My point is, your dog knows where he eliminated.  He's done it once so there's a good chance he'll do it again.  That's what dogs do, they pee and poop in familiar spots - which benefits us when we housetrain them, big I digress.  So restrict his access to that room until you can follow him around constantly waiting to catch him in the act.  Once he's done the deed and moved on you've lost the opportunity to correct that behavior.  Sorry, but rubbing a dog's face in their own filth only makes for a really icky nose and a really unhappy and confused dog.  Prevent the problem before it happens again by confining the dog to one room in the house or a crate when you leave the home or when you can't supervise him.  Give him a chew toy or two, a bit of water, and a comfortable bed.  And make sure you keep him on a regular potty schedule!

But why did he wait until you left the house to pee in that spot on the dining room rug, or worse, in your bed?  Besides the scent it could be because you made a big deal of it while cleaning the spot.  You spoke to him, probably even yelled at him, but you engaged him and you gave him attention.  Any attention, even negative, is still good attention to a dog.   In this case peeing on floor = attention from his favorite person.  You.  Or, possibly, he was anxious that you left and peed in that spot thinking you'd come back to clean it up and, again, pay some attention to him.  Clean up the pee while the dog is not around.

Now, the chewing.  Oy, the chewing!  And the digging and scratching, too.  The destruction, the mayhem, that is sometimes involved in owning a dog is enough to drive a sane person to the looney bin.  I recently had an email correspondence with my online friend Bobita.  In her email about her Labrador puppy she gave me enough ammunition topics to keep this blog going for awhile.   We've covered peeing in the house next we'll talk about chewing and other destructive behaviors.

That's our next post.  Y'all come back now, ya hear?